GGGOLDDD on Surviving Trauma and Building a Musical Empire (Interview)
This article discusses surviving sexual assault, which could be triggering.
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While it might not be groundbreaking in this day and age to be a woman who speaks up and admits to being sexually assualted, I can assure you, it still feels very powerful, painful, and important to the woman making the admission. When that pain can be transformed into something as powerful with music, the result is truly powerful.
That’s exactly what GGGOLDDD have done with their upcoming release, This Shame Should Not Be Mine. Originally commissioned for 2020’s online Roadburn Festival, the song blossomed into an album that tackles vocalist Milena Eva’s sexual assault from 17 years ago, something she is just now coming to terms with.
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“During the COVID isolation, I was alone with my thoughts a lot,” says Eva. “I started writing a lot, but it didn’t really work, and I lost my job, so I was grateful to be asked to do this piece and given something to do.”
The title track of the album was written during lockdown, and the album was conceptualized during a time when no one was communicating or interacting. When GGGOLDDD played the track, they weren’t sure how it would be received, or even how it was being received, as it was a livestream. Now, the band gets to see just how powerful the release truly is.
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“It has been very cathartic, I think, especially because of the responses we got,” says Eva. “So many people have gone through this, and so many people have reached out to us and sent me their personal stories or just shared that the song moved them.”
“It happened to me a long time ago; it was 17 years ago. Back then, I would have loved an album I could have put on and listened to and not feel as alone. I was really amazed that people responded to it that way because that’s apparently what they took from it, which I think is really important, and it’s just important to talk about, because it is still really taboo for a lot of people. And it’s also nice to share because somehow, with sharing, it gets a little less heavy. I think if you keep it for yourself, the weight gets heavier and heavier.”
This Shame Should Not Be Mine marries heavy and aggressive music with haunting, almost shrieking vocals and soft melodies highlighting the pain and agony, as well as the triumph, of the female experience. The cover, featuring Eva dressed as her own knight in shining armor, sends a powerful message from the first glance. Folks are taking notice of GGGOLDDD and what they have to offer—so much so that they’ve been given the huge honor of helping curate Roadburn 2022.
“It’s a bit different because some of the bands that would have played in 2020 are now on for 2022,” Eva explains. “So usually you’d get a clean slate for curation, but there are some bands already added. But in general it’s been really fun to be able to have wish lists and get to select a bunch of different bands to come out. We definitely have enough suggestions to fill several festivals, and so far, most of them have been received well.”
Support GGGOLDDD by checking out their upcoming record, This Shame Should Not Be Mine (due out April 1st via Artoffact Records), and stay tuned for more announcements about music, touring, and Roadburn band additions.
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If you are a survivor of sexual assault, know you are not alone. Reach out to RAINN or at 1-800-656-4673 if you are in need of assistance.
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